Drown In Me
In the depths of those indefinite moments, late at night, when time stands still and emotions run high, the mind is like a pool of crystal clear water, hidden high up in the mountains and shielded from the wind by smooth rocks. Gazing into the pool, every detail can be seen in perfect definition – from just below the lightly rippling surface to the grey rock at the very bottom. Every layer of life makes perfect sense; how people and places, emotions and memories all intertwine to create an image of the world as you know it inside your head.
The pool is the heart of your very being. Perhaps in some, the water is a stagnant, putrid shade of green. In others, the pool is so shallow that it would be impossible for anyone to ever get lost below the surface. In the most complicated of personalities, the pool itself is full of so many tiny details – maybe a whole world of plants and creatures and microhabitats – that it would take a lifetime to understand the delicate workings of such an intricate ecosystem.
Sometimes, when the world is standing still and I can hear only my own thoughts, it is nothing but the sound of your voice which reverberates around my head. If I try to distance myself from everything I know and look back upon that pool of individuality, I see only your face, and I cannot help but shiver the way I do in the rare moments when your arms are wrapped around my waist. You are like a water bird; a predator which never leaves the vicinity of my pool. You never quite dip below the surface, although that’s entirely your choice. You know you could own every single crevasse in the rocks, every delicate creature which resides there if you wanted. But as you glide menacingly over the smooth surface, those tiny water creatures hide in fear as you cast a permanent shadow over the stony bed. Everything comes to a halt in your presence. Nothing can move forward, and nothing in the past matters because you have such a strong magnetism that I can do nothing but hope that you drown in me. Perhaps one day, I will find the strength to pull you under.